And I Stood Still

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War.

Innocent surveillance killed innocently.

Kids loosing their parents.

Parents witnessing others killing their own flesh.

Beautiful cities, destroyed and full of dust of dried bloods.

Beautiful smiles drown in tears and blood.

It is happening now.

Past, present, future.

It will still happen.

.. and i stood still.

Old lady out and about on streets, picking up rubbish, traveling around town alone, in public transport, speaking their own mother tongue that hardly other people can understand.

I feel sad. I feel useless.

And i stood still.. watching it all happening around me, in front of my eyes.

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Dead snake found in front of college.

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Dogs, cats, dead snakes, strays around the street, homeless.

Lonely, unloved, hungry, cold, hot, thirsty is what they are feeling.

I can’t possibly adopt them all in my backyard, mummy will kill me!

So, i stood still again.

I am pretty fed up with myself.

I can’t be a volunteer, just because i don’t have transport. I am selfish.

I can’t drive those old folks to the destinations that they want to, just because i don’t have car. I am so fucking selfish.

I can’t travel to the crisis places to help the poor and the unfortunate, perhaps educate them, just because i have to finish my degree, earn big bucks and be a housewife to build my family.

I just can’t stand myself.

I don’t have the ability to do things for the world.. yet.

I really want to give back to the world.

I am so lucky that i have so many people who love and care for me.

I am so lucky that i have a shelter to stay, even if i have to pay RM370 per month for it.

I am so lucky i have my family who is always there for me, alive.

I am so lucky to have food to eat! Internet! Education! Money! Job opportunity! A Laptop! An Ipod! Water!

I have a boyfriend who dotes and loves me like there is no tomorrow.

Omg! I am fucking lucky.

But what about all these people, who have nothing?

I want to do something. I want to do something for the world. I want to experience hard life, feel how they feel. I want to help. I want to cook nice chicken rice for those who never eat for days, weeks, months! I want to teach those who don’t know how to spell. I want to give homes to those who don’t have homes and shelter. I want to protect the animals from animal cruelty. I want to give hope when it seems like there is nothing left.

and i stood still.. I did nothing.

I want to do so many things but i just don’t have the ability to do it now. I have a big dream. I dream to help, make a difference is other’s lives. I have a dream, to see them smile, and know, they are all gonna be someone someday.

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We are all living in God’s creation. Why are we destroying it? Why is all these happening?

I meant Mother Earth too..

I don’t think we should stay still and do nothing about it.

We are responsible to our younger generation. I don’t know if you are doing something about it or not, but i know i am aware of it, and i am doing something about Global warming, it’s the least that i can do, for now.

I was molested while going up to bus yesterday. This Indon guy touched my back, my bra there. I stared at him with my fierce look. I should have give him a punch, but i forgotten.

So, i stood still again?

Nope. I went to took his picture after we got down from the bus and threaten him that i will report to police.

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But these are all i got. Stupid phone!

So, don’t just stand up for others, stand up for yourself too.

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3 Responses:

Karthini said...

You took a picture of this asshole??? Sheesh...too bad you didnt get a good shot of his face. At least then you can get people to plaster his face all over the public transport system in KL. Ewww.....stupid asshole!

But still, i'm amazed that you even thought of taking his picture. Very brave of you...

Melissa said...

Hmm... atleast u managed to threaten him. I would hv stood still, really.
I'm sure one day, u'll b able to do d things u'd mention above. I guess determination n faith will guide u there. ^^

Melanie said...

but i dun wan next time again! :s
so scary and geli

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